We all deserve to have healthy, respectful relationships that make us feel safe, supported, and happy.
Healthy relationships encourage us to be the best we can be. They give us the confidence to voice our beliefs and opinions, and help us celebrate our achievements. In healthy, respectful relationships, we are connected to friends and family, have our own interests, and feel strong and supported in our culture or spiritual beliefs.
What does a healthy relationship look like?
Healthy relationships look like:
- Feeling like you can be yourself
- Respecting each other's space and boundaries
- Holding each other to the same standards
- Socialising with other people
- Making decisions together
- Having your own hobbies and interests
- Open and honest communication
- Controlling your own money
- Following your own cultural practices, religion or spiritual beliefs
- Agreeing on a fair work distribution and sharing family responsibilities
What if my relationship is becoming unhealthy?
In relationships that are unhealthy, one partner uses abuse to gain power and control over the other person.
Sometimes in a relationship, orange flags might pop up. These are behaviours that aren’t necessarily abusive but could cause harm if they progress or develop. For example, an orange flag might pop up if a partner insists on spending all your time together and gets a little upset when you socialise with others. In healthy relationships, orange flags can be addressed and resolved with open communication.
Unhealthy relationships turn into domestic violence when a partner, family member or ex uses abusive, threatening, and/or controlling behaviour to make you feel scared or unable to make choices. It might happen slowly, or all at once.
Abusive behaviour is never ok and is never the fault of the person experiencing it.
Abuse can happen to anyone
Domestic and family violence can affect people of all nationalities, races, religions, sexualities, genders, economic and social backgrounds. It can occur in all sorts of relationships, families and communities.
People belonging to communities that face discrimination may experience higher rates of abuse, or may find it hard to find a service that suits their needs. This includes people living with disabilities, Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander women, women from diverse backgrounds, pregnant women, and the LGBTQIA+ community.
Experiencing abuse in a relationship is never ok and it’s not something you have to put up with.
If you, or someone you know, is worried that a relationship is becoming unhealthy or abusive, it’s important to get support as soon as possible.
Where to get support
It’s always ok to get support and talk about what you’re experiencing in your relationship.
If you aren’t sure where to start, we encourage you to reach out to a friend or family member that you trust or a service like 1800RESPECT.
If your physical safety is ever in danger, call Emergency Services on Triple Zero (000).
For a full list of other supports available, visit our website here.
To join our community and access more 16 Days resources, sign up to our mailing list here.
